Ask a Twenty-Something: Friend Group Worries

Virginia Peaches ’26

Twenty-Something

Question: “Freshman – I feel like everyone’s already in groups of friends and I’m not – is that a bad thing?”

Dear Reader, Freshman friend groups are fake news, ESPECIALLY first semester. Trust me, I know it feels like everyone went to the same boarding school or grew up as neighbors in New Canaan or their town “just outside of Boston”. But you are not alone in feeling this way.

First off, friend groups always change, people either grow apart or grow together, it’s a part of life and a hard part to say the least. Personally, I had a “set” friend group first semester, but things changed (no bad blood) and I branched out to meet new people. Even then I still didn’t feel like I had found my “bridesmaids”. And that’s ok. It’s freshman year, you have your whole life to find your best friends.

It’s good to have a bunch of different friends to hang out with because if one group is doing something (or isn’t) that you don’t (or do) want to do you can reach out to your other friends and hang out with them. Not having a “set” friend group means that you don’t have to feel pressured to do everything they do and gives you some freedom. With this said, college can be very lonely sometimes and freshman year is probably one of the biggest adjustments you’ll have in your life (if you didn’t go to boarding school).

So, here’s my advice, you can never have too many friends. Be nice to everyone, it will get you so far in life, not just college. And most importantly, march to the beat of your own drum. While this can be easier said than done, if you do the things you enjoy doing, I guarantee you will find people to enjoy doing the same thing. Not only that, but others will have respect for you in your confidence of being yourself.

You’ll find your people,
A Twenty-Something Year Old