Aries
March 21 – April 19
We know you’re fired up about the housing office taking away lottery numbers, and we’re right there with you.
Taurus
April 20 – May 20
Get out of bed, your roommates are starting to worry.
Gemini
May 21 – June 20
Please stop trying to make conversation in frat basements.
Cancer
June 21 – July 22
It’s understandable to seek out places of comfort…but your sneaky link’s twin XL bed should not be one.
Leo
July 23 – August 22
If you like being the center of attention that much why don’t you perform for Spring Weekend?
Virgo
August 23 – September 22
Going to H&L is only a temporary solution.
Libra
September 23 – October 22
Though your sneaky link seems down…be advised they’re probably just down bad.
Scorpio
October 23 – November 21
Has anyone ever told said you have a serious RBF?
Sagittarius
November 22 – December 21
Let me guess…you’ve been doing 12-3-30 everyday in preparation for hot girl summer?
Capricorn
December 22 – January 19
Try to have some fun this weekend! You’re a college student after all, not your roommate’s babysitter.
Aquarius
January 20 – February 18
Ice princess, might I suggest you start to defrost? It is spring after all.
Pisces
February 19 – March 20
This is your friendly reminder to keep your sad playlists on private…or don’t, it’s totally up to you.
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